Tanyahealingminds

Hello World. A moment in my life that felt like it was straight out of a movie was the memory of 26/11. I remember working at The Taj lands End that night – we had a huge banquet for one the Big Fours. Earlier that evening we were uber excited, as a famous Indian singer with a larger than life personality, a large bindi and a strong base voice filled the air with excitement for the evening. She even asked us while practicing “Arey Taali toh bajao (Oh clap if you must), you guys need to have a lot of energy!”. I was a part of the Food and Beverage team, arranging cutlery for an open air banquet for thousands. I danced and pranced as we anticipated celebrities gracing the event. After all, this was Mumbai yaar – the heart of Bollywood. In a starred hotel where meeting your “larger than life” celebrities and fawning over them was – normal. We went about whispering like happy chipmunks, giggling like love was in the air. Love for an exciting life everyday in hospitality.

What was about to happen would teach me to be more “present” in every moment of life. Who knew that a few hours later would scar us for good. As we all huddled together in the ladies locker room – at least 50 in a 6 bunker locker. Security personnel were running helter-skelter making sure due diligence was met. The staff had a look of doom hiding away from guest eyes. We were shocked at first, expecting anything to happen at anytime that night. After a while we plucked up courage and reached the staff cafeteria to watch live news updates on the most horrifying terrorist attacks in India. Our hearts tore every time we heard the sound of bullets piercing the air or the blast of the dome. We watched the news as our colleagues tried to escape and hide. We imagined that tonight, our fates would be in the hands of the divine providence. After a while, we told ourselves – we are soldiers too. So we marched out of the cafeteria, and up the floors, to the guest areas and rooms, assuring the guests that we are here. All will be well. All entrances and exits had been secured and no one could come in or go out. Since we were close to the sea too, we anticipated catastrophe at any given time. No one ever spoke about how we looked at each other though. We did not know what to feel. We looked at each other sometimes with fear or suspicion or courage or “you got this”. After all soldiers are human too. We feared miscreants who helped our country’s destroyers were somehow inside the facility as well. But there is something about Mumbai, something about Swaraj, something still etched in the modern day patriotic fervour, that we will die fighting for our country and it’s people – on a battlefield, on the border, in a hospital or even in a hotel. Despite the smell of fear, the blood boiled and the heart pumped patriotism.

At around 6 am, the gates opened. The gates had been locked shut as a security protocol. We were “let out” to go home on our own. We did not dare to call our families to come get us lest something happened to them. There was a deafening silence on the streets while we walked and walked like zombies until we reached the threshold of Bandstand. We could however hear our hearts beating so loud, I wanted to cover my ears and puke with nausea. We could not fathom what was happening in lanes or streets around us. At this point anyone with a T-shirt and jeans, a backpack and a gun in hand could jump right in front of us and shoot anything that moved, even poor dogs. We just knew in that moment that the dawn was breaking and that the sun would come out and we will be alright again. Mumbai always does that, after floods, terrorist attacks, natural calamities etc.. No matter what happens today, the next day we see the local trains are always over packed as usual, dabba wallahs going about business, buses honking on busy streets while some of us grab a quick vadapav or missal pav and get to and fro from work. There again that dawn, we found taxi drivers with the spirit of Swaraj, agreeing to soldier us home.

This day, made me aware of my intuition and clairsentience. 2 months ago I had interviewed for the Trident and was selected but decided not to work there for no reason at all – I always had knee jerk reactions to anything all my life and decided – “Nah – don’t feel like it – I wont work here”. I then interviewed for Mahal and still got disappointingly selected at Land’s End for reasons I had not known. I remember fighting for two days with the management to station me there because I wanted to train at Mahal, the best place to be. This was no ordinary night. As we remember all those who called their family whilst hiding in cupboards, unable to tell them that this maybe their last call; who ran across the front office desk hoping to dodge the bullet; who slept unawares at the main train station; who decided to chill with friends at a popular cafe, who worked tirelessly at the hospital and police stations; who just tried to move and hide to survive and were killed in the blink of an eye; who regretted the color of their passports……. It felt like I survived a “Final Destination” of my own – a life size movie I never want to be in again. I still cringe but remember to heal my trauma. Here I am today 17 years and 5 months later, relaying the story to you.

Do you have a moment in your life that felt like it was straight out of a movie?